Leetson Hakksbeard gestured at his assistants to stop pumping the bellows, and turned from the roaring forge to cast a furious glare at the beardling sprawled on the floor. He said not a word, but the younger dwarf still flushed as he picked himself up, sparing a venomous glance at the bag of tools that had tripped him. He smoothed his sparse beard with considerable dignity, but then remembered his errand.

“My Lord Hakksbeard,” He gasped, weary from a long run on short legs, “our outpost reports by semaphore that the Duke of Ludd has marshaled his forces, and is marching on our borders!” 

The ancient runelord’s ugly, blocky face became uglier and blockier yet. “Wtf does that n00b think he’s doing?” He grumbled. “I pwned him all over the map last time.” 

The other dwarfs in the room looked at one another with some puzzlement. That their master was a genius was unquestionable, but at times his way of speaking was hard to understand. And if they'd understood him correctly, his assessment of the previous battle seemed somewhat overgenerous to his own side. 

The runelord’s resolve, however, was much firmer than his Khazalid. “Call up all the d00dz,” he commanded. “If those horse-fondling f@gs want to try to crash our (net)work, we’ll fuxx0r them.” He turned back to the fire, and his assistants began frantically cranking the bellows. The messenger stepped carefully around the toolkit, and then dashed out of the room. Shortly, the great warhorn of Karak Da’Kodez could be heard booming through the hold. Dwarfs ceased their business, looked at one another grimly, and then began to unpack armor and weapons from chests and closets.[/i]

My list:

Leetson Hakksbeard, runelord. Anvil of Doom, Shield 317

BSB thane (Wuttf Hakksbeard) with 1+ rerollable save and MRo Challenge (forces any non-Itp unit within 20" to declare a charge at the bearer's unit). 160

Thane (Emmba Hakksbeard) whose attacks allow no armor saves, and he can re-roll his own armor saves, with a shield. 142

10 Warriors, shields 90

20 Longbeards, shields, command, runic banner: Rune of Battle, Rune of Determination (+1 Combat res, take one break test on 1d6, not 2d6) 325

20 Hammerers, Shields, command, runic banner: Rune of Battle, Rune of Stoicism (+1 Combat res, unit counts as double its actual unit strength) 340

10 Quarrelers, shields 140

Cannon, Rune of Forging, Rune of Fire 130 (Re-roll misfires, flaming attacks)

Cannon, Rune of Forging 125 (re-roll misfires)

Grudge Thrower, Rune of Reloading, Rune of Accuracy 125 (can always fire even through misfires, can re-roll the scatter die)

Gyrocopter 120

Organ Gun 140

His list: Bretonnian Lord on pegasus, in a unit of 3 pegasus knights (somebody said you can't put characters in peg units... anybody care to comment?)

Paladin with virtue of discipline (no outnumber bonus to enemies in battle) in a unit of knights of the realm

Paladin with a weapon that ignores armor saves (argh! taste of my own medicine!) in a unit of 8 of whatever those s4 knights are, with great weapons to make them s5

Another unit of 6 s4 knights with great weapons.

BSB and paladin (don't know items) in a unit of 7 grail knights

A vanilla unit of realms

10 men-at-arms

15 men-at-arms (I think these guys had halberds, but it didn't end up mattering)

20 Skirmishing peasant bowmen.

I took one photo, which was after the bottom of turn two, but it will hopefully make the proportions clearer than ASCII diagrams.

When his assistants had finished setting up the ancient anvil, Mak'Bokpro, Leetson surveyed the field with some satisfaction. He had met the Brettonian interlopers on very friendly ground indeed. His two cannons, and the ancient grudge thrower, had dug themselves in behind a stone wall that would doubtless rob any cavalry charge of all its force, but that gave them a fine commanding view of the battlefield, and had a forest to guard their flank against unpleasant surprises. Their other flank was guarded by the beardlings of Karak Da'Kodez, ten warriors with shields and little combat experience. Next to them, his son Emmba Hakksbeard led a unit of longbeards, with his own hammerer bodyguards positioned slightly behind them and to their left, with his other son, Wuttf, proudly waving the throng's ornate battle standard in their front rank. A long line of quarrelers stretched out to the right of the warriors, with the fearsome Organ Gun anchoring their right flank. His own anvil perched behind the junction of the longbeard/quarreler line, with a fine commanding position from which to attack, and the throng's gyrocopter hovered directly behind a forest, waiting for a chance to harass something.

The Luddite deployment was baffling to the runelord's fine tactical mind. The Duke of Ludd had positioned his powerful unit of grail knights, as well as his two units of great-weapon-wielding questing knights, were in the extreme right-hand corner of the map, with a large hill between them and the dwarfish battle line. In the center, facing the most powerful concentration of dwarfish combat power, there were only a paltry 25 men-at-arms in two squads. On the left flank, in the extreme far corner of the map, were the fearsome pegasus knights, with the Duke of Ludd himself mounted on one of the magical beasts. Two more units of knights rode with them.

"Omg, n00bs!" Grumbled the ancient dwarf, sipping his ale. His anvil guards, used to his strange ways, ignored his mutterings. In their unguarded moments, however, they did wonder why it was that he insisted on having it dyed green, and on drinking it from those cylindrical metal cans rather than an honest tankard. However, as this did not bear on their oaths, they ignored it, and glared stoically at the Luddite line as the Brettonians, to a man, knelt to pray.

Dwarfs 1: I turn the hammerers to face to the left, since it's clear that the major attacks will come from the sides, not up the middle. The gyrocopter moves out into the middle of the map to marchblock the two units of knights opposite. Cannon shots kill two questing knights from way across the board. The grudge thrower takes aim at the pegasus knights, which it can BARELY see through the forest, but scatters to nowhere despite the reroll. The quarrelers kill a man-at-arms in the smaller unit.

Leetson watched in satisfaction as the umgak toppled with a crossbow bolt through his eye. Raising his hammer, he began to shape the magic of the Rune of Wrath and Ruin, aiming it at a distant unit of knights that he nonetheless could see clearly in his mind's eye. However, as the hammer came down, an unlucky insect buzzed lazily in the warm summer day, right under his hammer! The mighty steel crushed the life out of the horsefly, but its essence polluted the magic of the rune, and sparks flew from the anvil, then fizzled. "WTF, GTF0 LAMER!" Rumbled the runelord, flicking the insect's carcass away in a rage. He raised his hammer again, but the massive chargers of the brettonians began to thunder forward, and he knew his chance was lost for now.

Brets 1: His knights of the realm charge the gyrocopter, which flees, but not far enough! This is disappointing, but it does mean that his knights of the realm are pulled way out into the middle of the board and denied the outflanking maneuver they were trying for. His pegs with general inside fly up for a rear charge at my artillery bunker. His other knights move around the far side of the hill, protecting them from my artillery. I think this was a mistake, as he had a LONG way to go before he arrived. He has no magic and his one shooting unit is out of range.

Dwarfs 2: Both units of warriors move up to engage the men-at-arms and realms, who are now very clearly in the middle of the board. The grudge thrower takes aim, at the pegasus knights, misfires, and blows up. Both cannon shots also fail to do any wounds. However, the Organ Gun and the Quarrelers, between them, cause both units of men-at-arms to panic. They flee and never rally, so they won't be mentioned again. And then we came to the Anvil.

His keen eyes flicking back and forth, searching for any more horseflies, Hakkson raised his hammer again. He paused for a moment, reaching for one of his favorite triangular biscuits covered with dusty orange cheese. However, his pudgy hand accidentally knocked over his ale can, and green sticky liquid spread across the anvil's surface, almost immediately igniting into searing magical flames! The eldritch conflagration seared Hakkson's eyebrows completely off, and he stumbled back from the anvil, shouting something about overclocking and "chinese CPUs." The anvil guards, well trained for such an eventuality, ran for buckets of water and soothing ointments for the runelord's face.

Unaware of his father's predicament, Wuttf Hakksbeard reached down to his belt and pulled out a warhorn. Made of finest mithril it was, and inscribed with a rune, and Wuttf muttered the name of his foe, the Duke of Ludd, and then pressed the horn to his lips and blew a mighty blast: "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU N0000000000000000000BZ!"

At first, the haughty Brettonian noble barely noticed the warhorn. He was studying the dwarfen artillery bunker, and deciding from which exact angle he and his flying escort ought to attack them. Suddenly, however, the clear, deep note of the horn filled his blood with fire. Who was this insolent dwarf with his ornate flag to insult him so? His very presence was a smirch on the Duke's honor? Tactics, strategy, and sense disappeared from the Duke's mind, and he ordered his pegasus knights to charge, not the vulnerable dwarf artillery, but the solid ranks of the hammerers beyond them! The knights, seeing the rage blazing in the Duke's eyes, were in no mood to contradict this madness, so they charged as well with a mighty beating of wings as the stupefied dwarf artillery crews stared up at them open-mouthed.

Brets 2: So the Master Rune of Challenge got its points back, forcing the pegasus knights to charge the hammerers in the front. The knights of the realm charged into the front of the artillery bunker, and the knights-errant tried to charge its flank, but were slowed down by the forest and their charge failed by a few inches. In the rest of his movement phase, the large swarm of knights (2x Questing, 1x Grail) on the right make it around the mountain and line up for charges on the organ gun and the quarrelers behind it. The skirmishers shot at the organ gun and did nothing.

In close combat, the pegs killed seven hammerers, including their champion who challenged the lord. One wound was done to a pegasus knight in return. To my opponent's shock, this resulted in a tied combat, as I had a scr of 6 with the Rune of Battle, outnumber, and three ranks plus the BSB. The knights of the realm did little better, killing one dwarf cannon crewman.

Dwarfs 3: I reformed the quarrelers into a 2x5 block facing the Organ Gun, with the idea that whatever unit smacked the gun down would overrun into them. With this in mind, I moved the warriors into position to flank charge that unit (it looked like the grails at that point). The warriors moved into position to rear charge the knights of the realm, if my five remaining cannon crew could stubbornly hang on for two more combat rounds. This resulted in the situation in the photo seen above (note: the small template is actually the anvil, the model for which didn't make it to this fight.) The organ gun killed a grail knight but the rest made their armor or ward saves.

In combat, the knights of the realm killed another cannon boy.

While his assistants struggled furiously to put out the anvil fire, Leetson surveyed the field. As he watched with pride, his son Wuttf, bellowed out a challenge to the Brettonian Duke. The duke and his magical mount rained a flurry of blows on the younger dwarf, but his mighty rune armor, made of the finest gromril, deflected every attack. While Wuttf, encumbered by his banner, also failed to even scratch his foe, the Duke felt icy fingers of despair grip his heart. Dwarfen armor was deflecting all his bodyguard's attacks, and only one dwarf was slain. The others, their mighty great hammers rising for killing blows, clustered around him, murder in their eyes.

"Fly!" The Duke shouted, his voice breaking with the strain. His knights, however, shocked at such a command, reacted with fatal slowness. As their mounts' wings beat frantically, the dwarf's seized bridles, legs, manes, and tails, and slaughtered the pegasus knights to a man and beast. The line of Ludd was ended."

Yes, that's right. My dwarfs defeated pegasus knights in combat and then RAN THEM DOWN (I rolled a 6, he rolled a 5 on 3 dice).

This gave rise to an interesting situation... if the dwarfs proceeded directly ahead, they would run into a defended obstacle from the edge on. Either they could skirt it by turning and flank the knights of the realm that were fighting my cannon crews, or they would run all the way along it (bouncing through my cannons) and emerge on the other side, which would count as a charge on the knights-errant. In the end, we resolved it that way, which I think my opponent only agreed to because his morale had suffered a crushing blow.

Brets 3: His grail knights with BSB and Paladin charged the organ gun, and his questing knights angle around the skirmishers. to line up for subsequent charges. His shooting continues to fail against t4, and so we move on to combat. The knights of the realm kill another dwarf (finishing off one cannon) but can't kill the rest. The hammerers win combat by a lot against the errants, which roll insane courage to stay put! The Grail knights swat the organ gun like a bug and overrun only 9", so the quarrelers choose to flee instead of hold. They get away, and my warriors are now positioned for a gorgeous flank charge into BSB-having grail knights.

Dwarfs 4: The warrior distraction charges the rear of the realms, the longbeards with killy thane charge the flank of the realms (they BARELY have enough movement to wheel that far, but they do). The Quarrelers fail to rally and flee off the board (d'oh!). In the shooting phase, the anvil misfires AGAIN (this time we'll say that my runelord's burned hands fumbled with his hammer, if you like) and can't do anything until turn 6. That thing is made of fail this game (I couldn't even think of any more fluff to write for it).

Combat sees the thane (who has the MRo Alaric the Mad for no armor saves) kill two grail knights in three attacks, and the longbeards kill another between them. This leaves none to attack back, so they fail twice to roll insane courage and flee all the way off the board. After some deliberation, I opt not to pursue, reasoning that one flank charge (from the large unit of questing knights) is better than two (from the small unit as well), and outweighs the two banners I'd capture if I pursued. This turns out to be a good decision. The knights sandwiched between cannon and small warriors break, flee through the cannon and all the way off the board. The warriors pursue and pop through the cannon behind them.

Brets 4: he charges his large block with BSB into the flank of the longbeards, and his other knights in that area position for a charge at the anvil. It's around this time that his knights of the realm break from combat against the hammerers on the left flank and flee. For the rest of the game they won't be mentioned: on my turn, I charge the knights and they hold. On his turn, they rally and turn to face me and get charged again. Finally they flee off the board. This was actually sort of unfortunate, as it took my most powerful combat block FAR away from where the fight was.

In combat, I issue a challenge with the armor-save-ignoring thane, and find that his paladin in this unit also ignores armor saves. The two naked heroes wound one another once each. The longbeards need a 3 to hold, but get it thanks to a single-use rune on their banner that allows them to only use 1 d6 on their break test. However, since these are great weapon knights not lance knights, my situation didn't improve a ton.

Dwarfs 5: In case things go very badly for the anvil, I start marching the little warrior block toward it. Cannon can shoot this turn, weirdly. I overguess by a silly amount and waste the shot.

In combat, his armor-save-ignoring-guy kills mine (actually, the wound was done by the horse, and I failed the armor save twice after the paladin failed to wound with his magic weapon. Bah.). The longbeards don't manage to kill anything, break, and are run down. He pursues far enough that the anvil is out of his charge arc.

Brets 5: He attempt to charge the anvil with his small block of great weapon knights, and FAILS! Wow, what a break for me. Crucially, he's still 9" away. For some reason, he chooses not to wheel his larger knight block to face the anvil, but instead heads for the cannon.

Dwarfs 6: Warriors march out of the charge arc of the large knight block. Cannon guesses perfectly, with the overshoot landing right in front of the block of knights threatening the anvil... and sticking there.

His face an angry red from burns, his beard badly singed, and his maimed hands swathed in bandages and ointment, Leetson Hakksbeard gazed across the field at the maimed body of his son and heir. He cursed the horse-fondling umgaki with every curse he knew, and then siezed his hammer. An anvil guard gasped, and the other opened his mouth to speak, to tell the old one that with his crippled hands, and with Mak'bokpro having suffered so much, surely this was a foolhardy choice. The ancient, injured dwarf quelled him with a single "STFU," and calling on Grimnir for aid, raised his hammer one final time.

Yes, he got it off. The great weapon knights, now 9" away from the anvil, have their movement halved and cannot reach me next turn. My general will live.

Other than that, not much left to happen.

Brets 6: He charges his large knight block into the cannon. This ends up contesting a table quarter, as it turns out, so good choice for him.

In combat he can't kill all three cannon crew (he doesn't get lance because of the obstacle, so only 7 attacks, and he rolls horridly again. Dwarfs lose combat but hold and that's the game.

In the end, I've got him by about 600 points for a solid victory.

I think I took exactly the right list for this game, with serious SCR and a lot less shooting than normal. On balance, killing the grail knights was worth losing the longbeards with thane, and although I wish I could have gotten a little more mileage out of my hammerers, I feel like I played it more or less correctly. And I have GOT to get better at long-range guessing with the cannon. Also, the MRo Challenge was absolutely the MVP of this game. It's feast or famine with that thing: either it's incredibly valuable or completely useless (facing anything ItP). In this case, it killed his most expensive and most dangerous unit AND his general, when combined with my speed freekz, er, hammerers.

Thanks for reading!